Lately I didn’t quite feel like myself. I don’t really know who I am anymore. I guess that a bored woman is something to avoid. I thought I seriously liked that guy, but now I ignore his messages. I feel bad for him. Make a shy boy fall for you and then just leave him without notice … a pretty awful thing to do.
Yesterday I went out with a sweet guy, that type of guy your parents would want you to marry. It felt good, but my wild side might hurt him. I don’t want to do that. I’m a mess, is it okay? I guess not.
These thoughts of mine are weird. I don’t know what I want and in the process of finding that out, I’m hurting those around me. “You’re so dark” I tell myself. These two different personalities that share my body are like fire and ice. One wants parties, alcohol, drugs , adventures, hot guys with tattoos… however the other loves to read, study and longs for a nice relationship. I’m a mess.


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